

Stacy knew what that would do to the biosphere of the region. Few people cared: the ones that did seemed excited that they would get a lake. See they had decided in the midst of the Holy African Empire takeover that dovetailed with the water crisis that the best way to keep the locals well hydrated would be to dam the river system that led to the falls and flood the valley. But back when they existed, Stacy had to take the fight to them on their turf: Form B499-S. Difficulty of bureaucratic solutions is you need bureaucrats for it to work and most of those had been killed in later days in the coup. This was early in Stacy’s career, when he worked in far more bureaucratic ways. Of the city states left in the region, the Kansas Citystate had taken Joplin back from the Texarkan city state as the Holy African Empire had moved in again to drain the land of its resources. “Is there a word for taking a ship against command?”ĭrez said, “Earthbrothers call that stealing, but I know not what that means.” “To Earth?” He had flashbacks to dam day. We sent a scouting party and part of our engineering corps to inspect it,” Yorvo said. And only the flora and fauna of other planets such as yours, Earthbrother.” It’s our scouting parties that destroy flora and fauna. “We don’t destroy any natural habitats,” Yorvo said.

“As long as you don’t destroy your natural habitats, that’s all that really matters.” “There’s so much wrong with that statement,” Stacy said. “Conservatives saved your world from climate change, though much was destroyed Earthbrother.” “You conserve things as did your Earthfather Teddy Roosevelt,” Yorvo said.
#GRAND FALLS JOPLIN MO HOW TO#
He offered to trailblaze on their homeworld, to show them how to curate a way through their own rather pink and purple wilderness without either disturbing the flora or dying from encountering fauna or discouraging others to come and see and experience their wild. He wanted to take the surveyors down to the falls to show them, but they would not be persuaded. It was, in a way, preserving the falls: had Joplin back in ancient Missouri during the Dark Ages used any other condiment more than siracha? He’d found empty bottles of the stuff in the tumbledown rocks. The shop had crates of the stuff and apparently it never really aged. They bared their teeth like deep sea things and opened wide their maws.Īlien food wasn’t so bad if you added siracha, which they had on hand from one of their labs in an attempt to recreate a case of bottles they had commandeered from an antique shop. Therefore The Grand Falls are not and were never real.” Yorvo hummed even louder.

There are depictions of The Grand Falls in many imaginative paintings, songs, stories, and movies from Joplin in that time. Therefore what is in imaginative works of art is false. When he’d finished, he said, “Critical theory.” “So how do you know that The Grand Falls don’t exist?” We would die if we broke our place in time.” It is not our vocation, our place in time. As much as their head things could move up and down like chin things. “But you even said that you’ve never been to Earth, only abducted folks.” When his fit stopped he said, “They don’t exist, Earthbrother.” “I get the punchline but I don’t get the set up,” Stacy said. It’s tucked into the truck of one of the redwoods near the entrance.” “We have an exhibit on it at the Audubon. “You mean The Grand Falls from all of the paintings, songs, stories, and movies that came out of Joplin?” Drez asked. Easiest way to get more folks to see it, to preserve it.” “With designated picnic areas and a nice route that featured The Falls from a good vantage point that’s evolved over the decades. “Why were you blazing trails?” Drez asked. Sometimes I use my feet and leave some food for the animals to follow.” “I mean I blaze new trails.” He’d given up on worrying about how the sorts of beings to whom he spoke, spoke themselves. “Do you mean you start new trends in the scatterplot of human fashion?” Drez, the bigger and older one had asked him. He didn’t want to do much of anything other than meditate on how he’d been trailblazing when they’d picked him up. The initial shock of alien abuduction went about how you’d expect and ended with Stacy having blue blood soaked kale sticking out of his right ear and a temporary tattoo of an eighties cartoon on his thigh complete with a life fox they’d fuzed into his back. He’d been trailblazing near the falls when they’d picked him up. Stacy had spent his morning normally: tending to the wild chickens in the audubon center, taking a nap in the hammock he’d erected across the branches of the great Redwoods that now grew where oaks and sycamores once permeated the shale in the rainforest climate. “Why does no one like falls anymore?” Stacy asked.
